Sep
Biggest popstar in the world for 16 months and current Queen of 89% of Twitter’s spambot community, Katy Gaga, tries to find cultural relevance again by being the first person to explore the surface of her over-bleached scalp. The problem, of course, being that Madonna had already sported the iconic unborn fetus look, years earlier in proud, passionate, artistic protest for women’s rights (and because, at the time, daughter Lourdes had taken to applying generous amounts of Madonna’s supply of Men’s Rogaine Foam to her eyebrow and upper lip areas). We understand this is the first time absolutely anyone has noticed Stephanie conjuring the spirit of a xerox copy machine, so we’re willing to let it slide. In fact, one of our ctcm interns/submissive bottom is in the middle of writing a flattering email to Gaga where we will absolve her of her guilt and mention that even with the buzzcut, her forehead is still significantly smaller than Rihanna’s.
We will than lie a week later when she mentions it in public and say we never emailed a goddamn thing.
Aug
“Chains and whips excite me” is what Rihanus said as she copied Madonna’s iconic bondage and sadomasochism. The difference is obvious, Madonna’s actions were justified by her immaculate artistic integrity, while this house abuse victim and her forehead had done it all for attention as she was about to be dropped from her record label and was in urgent need of album sales (she’s still waiting for those numbers…)
Jun
Two words: Plagiarism is Rihanna’s only talent. How dare she copy Madonna’s iconic silver body paint. It doesn’t matter, Madonna looks hotter because she’s smizing. In the other hand, Rihanna looks very uncomfortable… probably because her video ‘Umbrella’ features a black person. I don’t blame her, I would be uncomfortable too.
May
Pink leotard ✔ mirror photoshoot ✔. That’s enough evidence for me, this S&M lover copied Madonna’s iconic photoshoot. It’s a funny yet failed attempt to become Madonna. But last time I checked, Madonna didn’t get beat up for attention.
Apr
Rihanna is hungry for that cake, too bad the Billboard charts already had dessert. This African spider monkey is trying so hard to become Madonna, she even got a forehead enlargement to like like Madonna! That’s right, Rihanna stole Madonna’s most iconic body part: her vagina forehead. Too bad she can’t rock a 6-inch forehead like Madonna can. Now she lookin’ a mess!
Apr
1989: Madonna invents long brown wigs with flat, long bangs.
2004: Brihanna steals Madonna’s most iconic haircut! Little did she know that stealing will lay a curse on her! This curse will - in the future, repel her from the Billboard 200. Now, this Caribbean “”“singing”“” tadpole is getting beat up for attention! Poor little girl, someone take her to her embassy! She needs to know that in this country we have copyright laws!
